There are many things that a study of acting will teach you, both good and bad. I wrote a play once - actually, a collection of ten plays - about all of the bad qualities that appear in an actor, and that includes forgetting the good ones. Among them were: Only being human and responsive in the temporary reality of a play, forgetting the simple joy of playing for want of business, and the jealousy between actors. I've seen a lot of the worst, most of which has thankfully been forgotten and packed away with old pictures, clothes, and ideas.
The art of acting, something I still believe in and promote with unyielding faith, is nothing short of miraculous to be around. I've been very fortunate, with all of my opportunities to direct and write; I love the actor and absolutely respect the honesty which they work towards. The earnest actor in our society shows the average person that no, they're not alone. Other people feel the same things, have been through the same experiences, and will, as Jane Martin once wrote, "lacerate self-exposure" to get closer to the truth of any given moment on stage or in front of the camera. It's a testament to the idea that we're all the same in many ways, that we understand basic concepts, and that our dedication to the piece is really a dedication to the viewer...to reach them...to tell a story. It's a charge to defend the truth - as serious as that sounds - but that's what the rehearsals are all about. It makes you think, doesn't it? The next time you see a play, think about this battle, whether or not the actors can demonstrate it on stage.
There is my love for actors. There is my love for the viewer. There's my love for the process. In the end, our part in a production changes us a little, alters the course of our lives, and it makes a unique connection to the moment between all of us. That's why it's so hard to walk away from productions that we get emotionally connected to. You know, as you approach the beginning of the next one, that it's going to affect you and change you in small ways, and that eventually you'll get to that closing night with a lump in your throat and many quick goodbyes. What follows is usually an unbearable silence, and then the next production picks you up. You still do it. There are more stories to tell.
It bodes well for me that the title for my latest play came to me in a lucid moment, and sat in me for a day before it became the title for the subject for this entry as well. As I feel this play begin to take its final shape, I have that emotional connection for having given birth to it. Even today, as I started explaining to a friend what it was about, I had to turn away for a moment and feign a quick distraction, and in that breath I knew I had given my heart to it. The question in the play is about defining "home" and where the people who mean the most to you truly live. It's not a place, it's not a phone number, it's not even email address. You can find that idea of home...right here, where I have my love for actors, for the process, for the story, my family, and the people who have influenced me the most in my life...
...and there lies the truth I defend, from the periods of chaos where everything is spinning around me to the quiet moments when I'm alone with my decisions and something to write with.
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